Phillipe & Jorge’s Cool, Cool World: JARheads, Candidates and Kudos & Congrats

JARheads 

Phillipe and Jorge are a bit late to the party concerning the Sinclair Broadcasting/Channel 10 debacle over shilling for President Pussy Grabber, but we’ve never been averse to putting the boot in once a man is down.

To be brief, Sinclair, which is owner of WJAR-Channel 10 and nearly 200 other local stations in the country, are professional Trump stalking horses, and remain a despicable member of the media. They coerced (no doubt with the threat of handing them a pink slip) their stations nationwide, including the JARheads, to put two of their on-air folks (in this case Frank Coletta and Alison Bologna) to deliver their distorted message. They then read, hostage tape-style, a screed that chastised “other” media outlets for airing the Orange Orangutan’s favorite fallback, fake news, while assuring us all that Channel 10 was above that. That flawed and arrogant presentation has been widely and rightly condemned in the national media, and locally in pieces by Urinal editor Alan Rosenberg and a biting Urinal op-ed by former TV anchor Dave Layman (see “Kudos and Congrats” below).

The problem here is the heavy-handed demand of all stations to put on the same holier-than-thou pontificating as a “must run” piece, along the lines of other Sinclair-mandated “must run” pro-Trump commentaries like those of Boris Epshtyn, a former Trump senior advisor, thundering on in a thinly veiled promotion of the president’s policies under the Sinclair flag. This was hilariously (and frighteningly) pulled together by the website Deadspin in a montage of dozens of stations, including Channel 10, rote reading the pre-scripted dialogue that reeked of Orwell’s Big Brother or a North Korean televised public appearance by Kim Jong-Un with the audience applauding like trained seals with the fear of a gun barrel being pressed against their temple otherwise.

The gun in this case is the offensive “no compete” clause in most all contracts for on-air personalities, which whether the person quits or is fired, prohibits them from appearing on another station in the same media market for a year. That means anyone who can’t make it for a year without getting a paycheck had either to suck it up or start rehearsing their “Would you like fries with that?” delivery.

As far as Alison Bologna is concerned, she is a very replaceable talking hairdo whom the JARheads could replace in a heartbeat. She no doubt understands that and was loathe to throw a career and salary out the window. But Coletta is a different story.

Frank is a local lad who famously appeared as a kid on the legendary Salty Brine’s children’s show on WJAR back in the Paleozoic, and has been an almost ever-present, recognizable and popular figure on the station’s airway since he joined the JARheads. His avuncular, warmly smiling presence on the morning news has become the face of Channel 10. P&J have also always considered him a friend, and have admired his work, as well as hearing through our backchannel sources at WJAR that he was a stand-up guy who has gone to bat for his co-workers when the situation demanded.

In this case, Coletta appears to have been on his knees rather than his hind legs. If there was anyone who could have stood up to Sinclair’s thuggish oafs, it was Coletta. There would be public outcry if he was axed for not kowtowing to his all-controlling masters at Sinclair, because as all Vo Dilunders know, we can criticize a home boy or girl, but you don’t let an outsider dare go after one of our own.

That is the reason why Coletta’s fall from grace impacts the credibility of the entire JARhead news department. If you can turn Frank, you can turn anyone. If we can’t trust our old buddy to just be a front man for a bunch of corporate media greedheads, upon whom can we rely? And the compromise is complete. You can’t regain your virginity, and you can’t be “just a little bit” pregnant.

Hey, Frank, how about a morning “coffee cup salute” to backing down? “The team you can trust”?  Right. About as far as you can throw them.

Sub-Genius Gubernatorial Candidates

 Your superior correspondents acknowledge that we’re not entirely enthusiastic about Gina the Queena of the Vo Dilun Jungle, but at least we have seen her perambulate on her hind legs. The same can not be said of Republican hopeful, Joe Trillo. As longtime P&J readers know, we dubbed former governor Bruce Sundlun “Captain Blowhard.” But one thing we can say for the late Captain is that he laughed at that designation. He was also a knowledgeable and competent chief executive who was responsible for more than a few improvements in state government.
On the other hand, Trillo is a blowhard with no notable achievements to point to in his many years in Halitosis Hall. Apparently, the main selling point of his campaign for governor is the fact that he was the Biggest Little’s point man for the current “stable genius” occupant of the White House. Since we have not seen any recent reports indicating that he is currently walking erect, it can be assumed that he has taken to all fours. (We base this speculation in hearing his most recent pronouncements on his natural habitat, talk radio.)
It’s a virtual tie for worst announced gubernatorial candidate, between Trillo and the pathological train wreck that is Giovanni Feroce, the former Benrus CEO, who is currently being sued by the NFL’s Buffalo Bills for nearly $1 million for, according to the Bills, welching on a sponsorship agreement he entered into with the team in October 2014. The Bills presented evidence in court that, at the time Feroce made the deal with the football team, he didn’t own the rights to the Benrus trademark.
Your superior correspondents assume our readers are familiar with Feroce’s shenanigans while at the helm of Alex & Ani. We continue to be amazed at how this “swinging genius” was able to live like a multi-millionaire for so many years without having any real assets. The whole thing is right out of the Trump playbook. Of course, we are not the only average citizens of the Biggest Little who can see that. We hope that the lesson learned is that this is no way to behave. 
 
Kudos & Congrats
….to the late, great Providence Journal photographer Bob Thayer, tenacious state house reporter Katherine “Faster Pussycat, Kill, Kill” Gregg and longtime Newport Daily News reporter Joe Baker, who have all been slated for induction into the Rhode Island Journalism Hall of Fame on April 27.
…to Casa Diablo regular and former TV anchorman, Dave Layman, for his insightful and no-holds-barred BlowJo op-ed article concerning Sinclair Broadcast Group and the near-impossible position it put its local anchors in by forcing them to read idiotic statements about allegedly biased journalism, ie, any news stories that might question the ridiculous utterances of the current President of the United States. (See item above.)

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