Opinion

Tone Deaf Dictator: Walking Eagle should be called out on his lies

Wuss Words

One of the most outrageous and laughable untruths of all time was the legendary report from North Korea in which the Pyongyang media claimed that their leader, Kim Jong Un, had played golf for the first time and had 18 straight holes-in-one. Doubtless sent out with the muzzle of a Glock pressed against their temple. This is a signature move of the blatant lying by a Third World dictatorship and a controlled media.

Unfortunately, in its own way, the United States has been inching down this deplorable path, led by the administration of President Donald Trump, offering blatant lies and misinformation.

Since our president has a predilection for giving people nicknames, let Phillipe and Jorge join the fun: Trump will be known as Walking Eagle; because he’s so full of shit he can’t fly

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Yes, the prior ruling administrations have been lying to the American public for decades. (A wave from the grave, Pat Tillman. And we’re winning that Afghanistan/Viet Nam – pick one – War! And Saddam has WMDs, Saudi leader Mohammed Bin Salaam knows nothing about the murder and dismemberment of a journalist, Jared Kushner is qualified to be a presidential advisor, etc, etc.)

There is an old expression that a lie goes around the world while the truth is getting its pants on. In which case Walking Eagle has more lies circling the globe than US satellites.

What is more disturbing to P&J is the reluctance of the media and politicians to call Walking Eagle out on his more preposterous statements, like injecting disinfectants into our bodies to fight CODIV-19. Even hardcore junkies would steer clear of that kind of advice for a fix.

The only politician we can cite for confronting the duplicity of Walking Eagle is Bernie Sanders, who said Trump was “a pathological liar.” On the nosey, Bernie.

But most politicians are tragically born without spines — and we’re talking hundreds of US senators and representatives plus state governors — who tiptoe around actually calling Walking Eagle a liar in public. This is some sort of warped  “conduct code for gentlemen.” Instead, they hide behind the wuss word of “pushback” instead  of simply calling out Walking Eagle for his blatant misinformation. Push this back, you gutless, self-serving bastards.

Likewise the media. If Walking Eagle says something you know to be total bullshit, call him on it then and there. Don’t say there was some”pushback” about any number of the howlers this idiot spews with his brain (for what it’s worth) disengaged from his mouth.

Politicos, face the fact: Donald Trump lives in the sewer. And you are going to have to do anything possible to stay out of it while he’s trying to drag you down to his level. But do not forget your duty to demand truth, accountability and honesty from the White House. To date, 90% of the politicians and media have been first class wussies.

Oh, and it’s about releasing Trump’s tax returns. Or is that too much of a heavy lift for you while you’re making phone calls to potential campaign contributors? Disgraceful.

The Untouchable

One of most interesting and sure to get even more coverage is the relationship between President Walking Eagle and one of his expert health care advisors, Dr. Anthony Fauci.

Fauci has stolen a march on Trump by not only seemingly defying Trump’s uneducated and completely absurd public comments, but has caught the imagination of the average American. Jeez, he has his own bobblehead doll and coffee mug, fer Chrissakes.

Fauci is now untouchable and Walking Eagle knows it, and you can bet the big crybaby goes nuts realizing his hands are tied. If Walking Eagle were to fire Fauci now, it would be a public confirmation of the fact that The Donald cares not a whit — what is already obvious to anyone paying attention — about expert healthcare advice or scientific data related to the coronavirus. He’s not a doctor, but he plays one on TV. But he is a gold-plated asshole, that he plays in real life.

Hold the Mayo

Perhaps the greatest example of how tone deaf the Trump administration is about coronavirus was Vice President Mike Pence, yeah, the guy with dead, hollow black eyes, showing up at the Mayo Clinic to meet with COVID-19 patients without wearing the mandatory face mask. Great message to send, you gormless numbskull.

But the humorous side of this — if there is one — was Little Mikey’s explanation for his blatant disrespect of everyone from victims to doctors and nurses. Not that Pence could give a damn.

Walking Eagle’s lapdog explained he wanted to be able to look the patients in the eye. (Honk!) This appears to show that he has no clue as to what the masks cover on one’s face. Perhaps he thought the masks were like the Lone Ranger’s, designed to retain anonymity. Uh, hey Mikey, get a clue, kemosabe.

So as Pence exited, leaving a trail of astounded and righteously pissed-off front-liners in his wake, we hope he picked up the COVID-19 bug with what he thought was the macho man posturing.

Hi-yo Silver, Pence, you moron.

Internet and Other Issues Due to the Virus?

P&J have been experiencing serious issues with their internet (and especially email) connections. We’ve been speculating on whether that has to do with a great increase in internet use due to the COVID-19 outbreak. Since no one seems to know anything definitive about much having to do with the pandemic, your superior correspondents have also been wondering if there is some relationship between the many grammatical and spelling errors we constantly see these days in reputable newspapers. A perfect example is a photo caption appearing in late April on the front page of the Pawtucket Times, identifying Mayor Donald Grebien as Donald “Green.” One way or the other we seem to be getting turned into morons in this increasingly “Cruel, Cruel” World.