I’d like to start this article with a big “welcome (or welcome back)” to anyone who will be spending the school year in this hidden gem of a state. There is a lot to explore in the next nine months, in addition to getting an education and meeting potential life-long friends. College pride is something that means a lot to students and alumni; it is a major part of life that shapes who they become. While growth, future self, and employment/life skills are important, this article focuses on what matters most: ranking the local college mascots.
Tupper II (Bryant University): Bryant has built its reputation as a local college powerhouse this century. They became a university in 2004 and a Division 1 school in 2012. Their men’s basketball team has made the NCAA Tournament multiple times. They also have Tupper II, a seven-year-old bulldog living up to the legacy left behind by his predecessor, Ironclad Tupper, who passed away suddenly of a stroke in 2017. While the other mascots have great qualities, you can’t compete with a live animal.
Scrotie (RISD): RISD isn’t known for its athletics, and interest in their hockey team, the Nads, was dwindling by 2001. Brian Cheskey came to the rescue with his design of an oversized, yet anatomically correct, human penis character. Scrotie cheers on the Nads (“Go Nads!”), in addition to the Balls (basketball) and the Pricks (fencing). Scrotie, an unofficial mascot who is tolerated by the administration and beloved by those with an adolescent sense of humor, has been known to dry hump other mascots and lead the crowd in NSFW chants.
Bruno (Brown): Brown is smart enough to realize that a burro would not be a great mascot, replacing it with a bruin, and then a bear (there apparently is a difference) after the taxidermized head of one was placed at an archway above the student union in 1904. Helen, a live bear, was replaced by Bruno in 1921. Different live bears held the Bruno moniker until 1961, when they changed to a costume. While a live bear is an awesome mascot, I can appreciate Brown’s change for safety and humane purposes.
Huxley the Dalmatian (Providence College): Most animal lovers agree that pets are better than most of their human counterparts. Huxley has been revving up crowds since 2017. PC had live dalmatians in the past, going by the name Friar Boy. This ended with the 2001 passing of Friar Boy V, leaving the team petless for 16 years.
Wildcat Willie (Johnson & Wales): The next four mascots could be put in any order. Wildcat Willie gets the top nod because it’s a fantastic name that matches his “I’m angry but also up to something” facial expression. He first became their mascot in the 1960s, when JWU was just a junior college. He was replaced with a griffin in the early ’90s, but the community started a movement to bring Willie back, which succeeded in 1997.
Sammy the Seahawk (Salve Regina University): Salve is a Division III school that has a successful sports program, especially in men’s baseball and men’s and women’s rugby. Sammy has progressed through the years, going from a basic and boring white with a creepy plastic face to its current stout, yet happy, brown and white color scheme with a beautiful blue beak.
Rhody the Ram (University of Rhode Island): Rhody is a cool enough mascot. They have a fun facial expression that works well with any situation. Coming in at 95 years old, the school describes them as “the spirit, the hype-man, and the heart and admiration for all things URI.” While accurate, there are a lot of teams with the “Ram” nickname. I don’t quite know why that irks me, especially given that a lot of local teams have common names.
Techie the Tiger (New England Institute of Technology): Techie is your basic-looking tiger. There’s nothing wrong with Techie, who also has a great name, but nothing stands out either. Techie should also watch his haunches as “Spot,” the autonomous robot dog known for roaming campus, may be hot on his heels.
Swoop the Hawk (Roger Williams University): A mascot and university representative since 1980, Swoop looks like a mixture between a Halloween costume and pajamas. Their light blue face with white surrounding their yellow eyes and beak looks angry, but not menacing. The body is mostly light blue with some dark blue on the chest. The wings are cool, with a mixture of light blue, dark blue, and white.
The Knight (Community College of Rhode Island): Knights and anything medieval are compelling, with a lot of potential for logos, mascots, and art in general. CCRI just went with a lighter shade of green and not much else, minus some red and yellow in the helmet. A sword and shield are always a winning combination, which is why The Knight isn’t further down this list.
The Anchorman (Rhode Island College): My alma mater had sports teams while I was a student, but I paid no attention. The anchorman works much better as a cartoon logo than a mascot. The Anchorman has a creepy and malicious smile that makes me want to look away. The sailor outfit and the trusty anchor he carries with him do help a little bit.
Friar Dom (Providence College): A Catholic monk who looks absolutely creepy. I’ll stop there.
Illustration by Mina Miki