Stable Genius: Carnival clown turns the Oval into a three-ring

What are we going to do about President Walking Eagle (he’s so full of shit he can’t fly)?

P and J thought Dubya Bush was the dumbest and least intellectually curious president we’d ever seen, but Walking Eagle has outflanked him. This guy has lied since he could walk and is in so far over his head you’d need a nuclear submarine to rescue him.

Not only does he have to “walk back” his positions on policy because he doesn’t know what he’s talking about, but his supposedly humorous remarks, like suggesting we do less COVID testing so we won’t find more people with the virus, seems to have gone over everyone’s heads, except for the numbskulls in their MAGA caps.

Maybe the most disturbing aspect of Trump is his sucking up to every petit dictator in the world: Xi Jinping, Erdogan, Kim Jong-un, Salaam whatever the hell his name is in Saudi Arabia, et al. And shall we bring up Vlad the Impaler Putin, who owns our president? Vlad knows you’ll do whatever he says, Walking Eagle.

One signal point in the Trump administration is his refusal to learn. While previous presidents took daily intel briefings six days a week, Walking Eagle deigns to attend about two a week. And he doesn’t even (or can’t) read the written versions. As an example, he claims he never saw the intel about Russia offering bounties to Taliban soldiers for killing our troops, because it wasn’t read to him.

So while P&J are not political advisers, while we play those arrogant, pompous dickheads on TV, we have a solution to this problem: flash cards. Even the intellectually challenged Walking Eagle might actually be able to absorb the info in shorthand form, without taking away from his Fox News watching time.

And please, stop supporting this clown who makes the US look like a cheap carnival on the international stage.

Slowly, Slowly Catchee Monkey

Phillipe and Jorge have been huge admirers of Governor Gigi Raimondo’s handling of the COVID pandemic, from the hard-assed “Knock it off” to the constant stream of information to the public.

But we are a bit worried about the new hurry to implement Phase III of the comeback strategy. As has been said, there are a million people in Little Rhody, and a million different opinions. Many of them of the brass-necked kind, with a “Don’t tell me what to do” attitude. So when you look at the beaches for which the Ocean State is renowned, from First Beach in Newport to Narragansett and Scarborough, there is no way in hell you are going to get social distancing, as has been obvious anytime the sun shines and people flock there.

We have made great strides in combatting COVID, so switching from pumping the brakes to hitting the gas pedal at this point could undo all the good work so far. Patience is a virtue, so let’s employ it for everyone’s sake. Gracias.