Philippe & Jorge’s Cool, Cool World: Go, Space Force!

Space Cadet

Now that we have firmly established that President Big Baby is a delusional, autocrat-worshipping, misogynist and racist who’s lying if his lips are moving, here comes another splendid idea from the Fantasyland at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue: Space Force!

As is the case with anything the Orange Orangutan touches, it required a tweet from President Hissyfit; in this instance: “Space Force all the way!” That juvenile response should appeal to anyone under the age of 12. All that was missing was the pep rally and cheerleaders with hired participants to make up the numbers. Phillipe and Jorge’s reaction? Wow! Bow-wow!


For starters, the name of what would become the sixth military branch of government is impossibly lame. It sounds like part of the old Buck Rogers show (featuring at times Buster Crabbe, groundbreaker in wearing a man’s corset, soon to be followed and eclipsed by the mighty William “Captain Kirk” Shatner). You almost can hear a loud Saturday morning cartoon show theme song played every time someone says, “Space Force!” Even The Donald seemed to sense this was a total bust, as he had Vice President Mike “Dead Eyes” Pence make the announcement.

Defense Secretary James “Lap Dog” Mattis also appeared to be less than enthusiastic about this deranged idea. He said through no doubt gritted teeth, “We need to address space as a developing war-fighting domain and a combatant command is certainly one thing that we can establish. This is a process we’re in.” Oh goody, we’re preparing for future space wars — great that our first major export to the cosmos will be war when we can’t even patrol Earth properly.

“Space Force all the way!”…into the crapper.

‘Fessing Up

What with the torrent of lies, deceptions and fantastical claims that roll out of the White House on a daily basis, we are becoming inured to the flagrant bullshit being foisted on the public.

The emerging trend now is an old GOP trick. When they have their ass handed to them, they slowly back off an issue — a sign that they know they have gone a bridge too far. Such is the case with both the collusion with Russia and Little Donny’s meeting with a Soviet lawyer at Trump Towers.

In the case of collusion, at first it was total denial and stonewalling, accompanied by the usual desperate falsehoods. But now we are told that maybe we did deal with the Russians and their shady envoys, but that isn’t criminal! That seems to be the only refuge that can now be found, and it might fool some people had Rudy Giuliani not been the message carrier, as he looks like a demented screen version of Nosferatu in a suit, only creepier, if that can be believed. (Sorry, Klaus Kinski, he is more repellent and frightening than your version.)

This is the same getting caught but not admitting it trick Republicans have used in the climate change battle. First, members of the GOP claimed it didn’t exist or was a Chinese hoax (according to our genius president). Then once the hurricanes and droughts picked up, along with the highest temperatures in recorded history, Republican lawmakers went after the claim that it was caused by humans, as in the dramatic shift in emissions since the Industrial Revolution. So now the preferred tactic is to forbid use of the words “climate change” at many federal agencies. If that’s not sticking your head in the sand, we don’t know what is.

Finally, one issue that should never be abandoned as we truck on forward through the Trump muck is that Big Baby has still not released his tax statements, despite have pledged to do so during the presidential campaign. This is where P&J certainly believe one thing: that this would expose his dealings for years with the Russians, and how they have his ass in a wringer with the financing they have given his projects. Donny Jr. admitted that years ago, and it is doubtless the lever (read: “extortion”) they are using, which results in President Pussy-Grabber shamelessly snuggling up to Vladimir Putin. Trump’s taxes can reveal a great deal, so don’t let this issue die.

Meanwhile, on Planet Vo Dilun

A report in the August 10 Providence Urinal by Brian Amaral told of the arrest of a 25-year-old Cranston man, John “Mack Sauce” McEvoy (who had recently been released from the ACI for violating a home confinement charge), for leading a teenage girl around on a leash. Police were notified when numerous people contacted them after seeing videos and photographs of McEvoy walking the 17-year-old girl around on a leash in a Cranston neighborhood.
When police confronted McAvoy and the girl, she told the officer she wasn’t being held against her will, but McEvoy was charged with resisting arrest after pushing the police detective who approached him. The officer then pepper sprayed the suspect.
In nearly 40 years of writing this column, your superior correspondents do not recall writing about a similar incident. Our only question is, have people around here gone off the deep end or are Phillipe & Jorge  out-of-step with contemporary behavioral patterns?
RI International Film Festival
Jorge proudly represented Casa Diablo at the opening night of the RIIFF and can report that a number of outstanding and enjoyable short films were screened. He also was delighted to see his friend Winnie Brownell (the retired Dean of URI’s College of Arts & Sciences) honored that evening as a major force in the art of filmmaking here in the Biggest Little. And a big shout out and thanks to Dr. Tom Zorabedian, a longtime faculty member at URI’s film program, for procuring Jorge’s ticket. We congratulate all our local filmmakers.
Private Lives

Phillipe and Jorge were greatly saddened to hear of the untimely death of our longtime pal, Robert Ellis Smith, which came as he was rehearsing for a play, one of his many talents. He had also just sent P&J a story idea about what assets Little Rhody has lost in the past year, a list to which we must now unfortunately and ironically include Bob.

His experience and achievements are as long as long and strong as one of Shaquille O’Neal’s arms. He was an attorney, author, editor and a publisher/journalist down through time, and he was also active on the non-profit side, serving with the R.I. Coastal Resources Management Council, the American Civil Liberties Union and on the Block Island Conservancy, where he resided. He also wrote the book Block Island Trivia, an eternal bestseller with native and tourists alike on The Block.

But perhaps his jewel in the crown was the publication of a newsletter, the Privacy Journal, one of the longest running newsletters in America. His passing is doubly felt because he was a lodestone of advice on people’s rights and freedoms in today’s world, where citizens’ lives and supposed confidential information are being blown up like IEDs on a daily and going basis by invisible hands, and the word “privacy,” in its true meaning, is becoming extinct. As the old joke goes, don’t worry if you forgot your passwords, the FBI has them. Just give them a call.

Ya done your best, Bob, and rightly foresaw the need to have people mind their own beeswax unless you chose to have them informed. A rare breed.